


A Shoulder to Cry On

by imaginethat_peepshow



Category: Bleach
Genre: Angst, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Fanart, Rebound Sex
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-18
Updated: 2019-02-17
Packaged: 2019-10-30 18:23:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,813
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17833775
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/imaginethat_peepshow/pseuds/imaginethat_peepshow
Summary: Shuhei may have always had feelings for Yoruname, but was too much the gentleman to act on them, or even speak them outloud. He wasn't about to complicate the relationship she was already in. But when that relationship ends abruptly and she runs to him for comfort, complication finds them anyway.





	1. Just That

The soft knock at his door had Shuhei groping through his memory for some forgotten appointment. Failing to remember anything only left him confused.  _Who the heck just shows up at my door at this hour on a weeknight?_  He finished pulling on his sleep shirt and shuffled to the door.  _Dammit, Izuru, if you’re drunk, I swear._  The person on the other side was neither Izuru nor drunk.    
“Yoruname?” He blinked in surprise. This was far from the first time she’d come over unannounced, but she hardly looked like herself, crumpled and small and… crying? 

“Shuhei…” She sobbed, her voice so tight it was hardly recognizable. “… I was right.” Weeks of conversation flashed through his mind, days of worry and speculation and frustration as the bright girl he knew wilted under the burden of her life’s uncertainties. And here she was, at the bottom of it all, choking on the truth. She didn’t need to say anymore, he understood completely. Half of him wanted to embrace her, to tell her that it was going to be ok. The other half wanted immediately to hunt down and destroy the scumbag responsible. He stayed frozen for a long moment while the two sides battled for control of his body.

“Come here…” He opened his arms and she fell against his chest, shivering and crying and raw. Violence wasn’t what she needed, not matter how satisfying it would be. She didn’t come to him because she needed a champion, but because she needed a friend. Besides, he knew once she pulled herself together she was perfectly capable of carrying out whatever violence was necessary on her own. 

He led her inside and closed the door. It was a small feat to get her to the couch. She was blind from tears and almost too weak to stand up on her own. Once they sat down she curled up against him and wept harder than he’d ever seen. 

“Deep breaths, now.” He rubbed her back and glanced around the room. Anything he could think of to make her more comfortable was out of reach. So he had to wait it out with her and try to convince himself that he wasn’t being useless. The first thing she needed was a literal shoulder to cry on and he was being that. 

The second thing she needed was water, which he was all too happy to fetch for her.   
Then she needed someone to sit next to her quietly while she processed what had happened, and he was glad to do that too. 

“… I’m sorry.” She said finally. “For barging in like this.” 

“What? Don’t be.” He waved it off. “You didn’t ask for this to happen.” 

“No, but I shouldn’t have just shown up unannounced and thrown all my problems in your lap.” She sniffed. “It isn’t fair to you. It’s my fucked up breakup, I should be able to-”

“Yoruname.” He cut her off. “It’s ok… to not be ok sometimes.” He wanted to smack himself in the face. Countless hours spent in the pursuit of literary excellence for the newspaper and when it mattered most, that was all he could come up with. It was so bad she started crying all over again. Ok, maybe that wasn’t the reason, but still. The second fit was far milder than the first and she pulled herself together relatively quickly. 

“Can I… can I use your shower?” She croaked. “I need to get him off of me.”

“Of course…”

* * *

After scrubbing every inch of her skin until it was red, Yoruname sat down in the shower and let the water fall over her. It didn’t have the restorative effect she hoped for. She still felt like the same mess of a person, still felt the claws of her failed relationship in her heart. The reality of it broke over her. Not just the fact that it was over, that the warmth of love was officially gone, but that now she had to move, change her routines, re-identify as single. It was overwhelming, and she was glad Shuhei didn’t have to see her start crying  _again_. 

 _Why did I even come here?_  She rubbed her face.  _I should have just gone to Rangiku’s place… no… no, I really don’t want to have to explain all of this shit to her tonight._  She sighed. Some days Rangiku’s pep talks were life saving. Today was not one of those days. Of all of her friends, Shuhei really was the one she could turn to who would just let her be upset without prying. They’d always had a weird understanding of each others’ emotional states. Or maybe he was just considerate like that. 

She got out of the shower to find he’d laid out a change of clothes for her. The small gesture threw into contrast the lack of kindness in her relationship. Tears came again. Not for what she lost, but for the time she wasted on what was apparently a black hole when there was so much light to be had. 

Shuhei was back on the couch, fussing with the tea kettle on the table. Once she was settled beside him, he poured her a cup. For a while she just sipped without speaking, silently glad again that she hadn’t elected to go to Rangiku. If she had, surely she’d be drinking sake instead, which would be disastrous. 

“Thank you…” She said quietly.  _Thank you for being this person for me._  

“Don’t mention it.” His arm rested on the back of the couch behind her. “I wish there was more I could do, but… I never know what to do in these situations.”

“You’re helping more than you think.” She managed a weak smile. 

Time slipped by unevenly, sometimes rushing and sometimes crawling towards the small hours of the morning. They talked about everything and nothing, anything to distract her or sometimes force her to concentrate on her tangled feelings. Sleep was about the only thing not brought up. They both knew she was too wound up for it. Eventually she recounted the relationship-ending conflict that sent her running to his door. He sat patiently through all of it, telling her that she deserved better and it wasn’t her fault and that everything would be ok.   
They kept on talking until the time of night when things don’t feel as real anymore. When the concept of tomorrow becomes blurred because it’s so late in one day that it’s early in the next. When buried thoughts rear up and refuse to be ignored. By the time she realized how careless they were being, it was too late. He was so close already. Now without filter of a committed woman’s eyes she saw how handsome he really was. And there were no words for the warmth of his presence, how safe he made her feel. If she made a list of traits for her dream partner, he ticked all the boxes. So why weren’t they something more? The timing was never right. The timing wasn’t even right now, but she was in no mood for caution. 

Leaning in to kiss him was easy, natural. His lips formed to hers as if they’d done it a thousand times. Years of awkward chemistry welled up in her chest and for just a moment, she forgot everything else. 

“Uah, sorry.” Shuhei pulled away abruptly. “We shouldn’t have done that.” 

“Why not?” She asked without thinking.

“Because you’re too vulnerable right now, I… I’m not gonna lie to you. I want to… I want  _you_ … so much. But not like this.” He explained shakily. “I don’t want to take advantage of you.” 

“I know you don’t…” She bit her lip and looked down to where her hands curled into fists in her lap. “If I didn’t, I wouldn’t have come here.” 

“Then why are you being so cruel? Are you testing me?” His voice was low, limping and hurt. 

“I’m not trying to be, I just… I know I’m being selfish, but…  _I need to get him off of me_.” She didn’t have a better way to explain the thick, sticky feeling on her skin, but somehow she knew he would understand. This wasn’t about forever, or fixing everything, it was about fixing one thing: the feeling that her ex still had ahold of her. But a complicated solution like this might cause more problems than it solves. 

“I can do that for you… if you can promise you won’t hate me in the morning.” He said after a long pause. “I don’t ever want our friendship to die… especially not over this.

”There’s nothing you can do that would make me hate you.” Meaning, he wasn’t capable of the kinds of things that would make her hate someone. It wasn’t in his character. 

“Alright…” He stood up and offered her his hand. 

“Huh?” She reached for it despite her confusion. 

“This might be my only chance to be with you… I want to do it right.”

 

Laid out on his bed with his weight on top of her, with his lips softly moving against hers and his hands roaming her curves, it all felt right. His touch burned wherever it found bare skin, but he didn’t rush to remove any clothing. Instead, he seemed to get lost in their endless kiss, forgetting that he had permission and invitation to do so much more. 

She reminded him by pulling up his shirt. He yanked it over his head and threw it roughly aside so he could go back to kissing her as fast as possible. She ran her palms up his muscled back and used her nails on the way back down, gently grazing his skin. Arching into her touch, he moaned softly against her mouth. He reached down to remove her shirt as well, or rather, his shirt that she was wearing. The distinction stoked a heat in her chest and she could only imagine what it did to him. His kisses fell to her neck now, inching down to her collar in a burning line. Her skin prickled in anticipation as he drew lower, his lips trailing between her breasts as he kneaded her flesh in each hand. No longer able to comfortably reach his back, her hands slid down his arms. The muscles flexed under her fingers as he shifted.

When his fingers closed around the tender skin of her nipples, her breath caught in her throat. He pinched and turned and pulled until it was hard to exhale, leaving her to make short gasps while he worked. Then his mouth drifted aside, wrapping around one and setting his tongue to it. 

“Sh-shuhei…” She squirmed, his ill-fitting shorts sliding down her hips on their own. 

“Hmm?” He half-stood to pull them away, but not until after he took his time thoroughly teasing both nipples equally. He stayed that way, looking down at her naked body stretched out on his bed for too long to be comfortable. She could feel his eyes studying, surveying her and couldn’t help but turn away. 

“… What?” She asked weakly.  _Is he changing his mind now that he’s seen me?_  Fear tightened her throat, padded by doubt and the pain still fresh in her heart. 

“You’re… so beautiful…” He breathed. Just like that, all her misgivings were washed away, replaced with warmth and courage and optimism at least for the moment. She looked up just in time for him to descend on her once again, kissing her all the more fervently. Some distance stayed between their bodies, enough to see and enough to reach between. 

With the tip of one finger, he drew a line down her center from her chin all the way to her slit. It slipped inside, testing, exploring, before he added a second. His shaft was easy to find, even reaching blindly between them as she was. Her hand wrapped around the base, stroking up to the tip. Precum coated her palm while he throbbed in her grip, thrusting slightly into her hand while his fingers pumped in and out of her heat. 

They got lost again, in the high they never expected to find in each other. It felt good, it felt right, natural and easy. Every sensation, every reaction was new and breathtaking and there was always one more to find. Each time they tried to rejoin their lips they were interrupted by one moan or another. They went on and on like that, almost forgetting there was anything else to do. 

When they did remember, when he was finally inside her, there was nothing to do but hold on and try to remember to breathe. He held her so tight she felt she would break, but at the same time it was as if he was holding her together. It was a wonder he could find the leverage to drive so deep with the way she clung to him. At first she worried when her nails dug into his skin, that the pain would put him off or that she would seem too desperate. 

“That’s it, baby… mark me up…” He growled in a low, burning voice that made her stomach flip. 

“Oh… Shuhei…” The tingling feeling from the drop stayed in her gut, fluttering and spreading. 

“That’s right… say my name just like that…” Every word fanned the heat in her core and she obeyed without thinking, sighing his name over and over.

“Yoruname… oh, you’re even better than I imagined.” 

 _Imagined…?_  “Shuhei… have you… thought about me before?” She ventured carefully. 

“… Yes.” He admitted lowly, desperately. That one word bloomed more fire in her than all the others. It made her wonder how many of his fantasies she appeared in, a thought that sent her reeling, her eyes rolling back into her head. He uncoiled his arms from around her to run his hands through her hair, to hold her hands above her head. “I tried not to, but… I couldn’t help it.” 

“Sh… Shuhei…” This one came out as a tense whine, out of her control. 

“You’re so amazing… so beautiful… so- oh, god you feel so good…” He buried his face in her neck and they were gone again. Drifting, high, so caught up in each other that everything else faded away. There was only the sound of their labored breathing, the soft rhythm of their bodies coming together, the heat between their skin, and the winding tension in her core. Then it was all coming undone, she simply couldn’t coil any tighter. 

“Shuhei, I’m-!” She choked on her release before she could warn him. 

“Hahh, me too…” He strained. A few beats later and they were gasping, panting as his intense pace tapered to drawn out, jerky thrusts. His lips landed sloppily over hers, twisting in a heavy kiss that continued until the last traces of their shared orgasm faded.

 

“Do you feel any better?” He asked when they were done cleaning up. 

“Well… yes.” She blushed. The thick feeling on her skin was gone. Instead she just felt naked and sweaty. 

“I’m glad…” He kissed her forehead gently. “You should get some sleep.” 

“What about you?” She wanted to grab ahold of him, to make him stay, but he was already walking for the door. 

“I’ll sleep on the couch.” He explained. “If I stay, I don’t know if I can stop myself from keeping you up all night… and I know I won’t be able to let you go in the morning.”


	2. Gentleman's Guilt

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rangiku arrives early the next morning, delaying, but not reducing the inevitable awkwardness.

The door opened with a sharp snap, slamming against the wall and shaking on its frame. Shuhei shot upright and nearly toppled off the couch, flailing for a sword that wasn’t there. His eyes, still unfocused from sleep, could only make out a silhouette in the doorframe, backed by blinding sunlight.    
“Where is she?” A familiar voice demanded. Shuhei blinked and recognized the figure as they stepped over the threshold. 

“R-rangiku?! What the hell- you scared me half to death, you could have just knocked!” 

“I’ve  _been_  knocking for ten minutes!” She roared, stomping across the room to get in his face. Her arms were positively laden or she might have smacked him. “Now I  _know_  she’s here, so you tell me where you-” She seemed to only just now see the blanket over his legs and the pillow knocked to the floor. “Aww, Shu-shu, what a gentlemen you are.” Her voice arced up to a sweet squeak. “Giving up your bed for a friend in need, how chivalrous!” 

“Yeah… right…” He forced the words through his teeth and tried to push down the guilty roiling in his gut. In an effort to look anywhere but her face, his eyes fell to the assortment of stuff tucked under her arms. She brought some of Yoruname’s clothes, a couple bottles of sake, a large tub of ice cream and- “What the hell, is that a flame thrower?!” 

“Hmm?” Rangiku looked down as if she just noticed it too. “Well sure, didn’t Yoruname always say if he ever cheated on her she’d set their mattress on fire?” 

“Do you even know what happened?” He winced.  

“Well no, but it must have been pretty awful for her to come here.” She pointed out. 

“Rangiku?” Yoruname’s sleepy voice came from behind them. She appeared in the bedroom doorway, mercifully redressed in the clothes he leant her. 

“There you are!” Rangiku cried, dropping everything in order to embrace her. The tub of ice cream landed on Shuhei’s foot and he had to bite his lip not to cry out. “I was so worried when I heard the news, why didn’t you come straight to my place? Oh well, it doesn’t matter now, I’m here to make it all better.”    
Shuhei didn’t want to admit that he was glad Rangiku was there. It meant they didn’t have to talk about what happened. It was easier to act like nothing happened for a third party. However, after having to convince her that drinking wasn’t an appropriate 9 AM activity, he wasn’t quite ready to relinquish Yoruname into her custody. They settled on making pancakes as an alternative.   
His kitchen was only designed for one person, so cooking with three was an adventure. Each of them was always bumping in to someone or something, dropping this or spilling that, it was a regular comedy routine.

Yoruname needed a sense of normalcy, so he tried his best to act the way he usually did around her. But every time their skin touched by accident it tore through his nerves like a bolt of lightning. The vivid details of her body were burned into his mind and he simply couldn’t bury it. Every time he looked at her he felt sick, but it wasn’t regret that turned his stomach. He was every bit as disgusted with himself as he was with her scumbag ex. He’d made her promise not to hate him in the morning; he hadn’t stopped to think about hating himself.

The three of them sat on the floor in the living room. If Shuhei managed to eat any of the pancakes they made, he didn’t notice. Rangiku added a massive scoop of ice cream to Yoruname’s and her own plate. The girls talked animatedly, but he couldn’t have said about what. When they finished eating, Rangiku reached again for a bottle of sake. 

“I really shouldn’t.” Yoruname eased. “I should really go talk to my 3rd seat today. I think he’s the one in charge of housing. The faster I apply for a housing transfer, the better.” 

“Oh, you’re probably right… as always.” Rangiku sighed. “Oh well, I’ll save it for tonight and we can drink it then!” 

“Sounds like a plan.” Yoruname smiled weakly.

 

Shuhei and Rangiku stood outside and waved as Yoruname headed off down the street. The guilty twisting in his gut only got worse the further she went. Things would never be the same between them; he’d gone and ruined everything. There was no telling how awkward it would be the next time he saw her. Even if by some miracle it was all the same to her, she was sure to notice it wasn’t for him. Their friends would notice, it would get  _more_  awkward, everything, everything, everything was ruined because he was a complete bastard. 

“Shuhei… thank you.” Rangiku said softly. “For looking out for her. I’m glad she had someone like you to turn to and-”

“Stop.” He cut her off. 

“Oh come now, don’t be modest.” She patted his shoulder. “Real gentlemen like you deserve-” 

“I slept with her.” He blurted. 

“You…  _what_?” Rangiku’s face grew dark as she sorted through everything his simple sentence implied. “Shuhei, how could you?”  

“She asked me to! I tried to talk her out of it, but…” He tried to rationalize, but his heart wasn’t in it. Blaming her was about the worst thing he could do now. 

“You idiot!” She landed a hard slap across his face and grabbed his shirt with both hands. “You got it all backwards! You’re supposed to sleep next to her, comfort her when she feels lonely and unloved, and keep it in your damn pants!” She railed, shaking him with each word. “Instead you fuck her, tuck her into bed, and then sleep on the couch?! What is that?!” 

“I didn’t want it to get complicated!” He shot back. “She didn’t need me throwing my feelings on top of everything else!” 

“Complicated?!” She shrieked. “You mean now you’re telling me that you have feelings for her and you’re going to just let her walk away after all of that?!” 

“H-huh?” He faltered. 

“Are you so scared of rejection that you won’t confess your feelings to a girl even after she agrees to sleep with you?! Are you nuts?! Get after her right now!” She whirled him around and threw him in the direction Yoruname left. He stumbled and landed hard on the ground. “You chase her down, you fall to your knees and you tell her how you feel! You two can work the details out on your own, but I will not have her losing sleep wondering what is going on in your thick skull!” She stomped her foot and pointed wildly. 

“You’ve got to be kidding me!” Shuhei stared up at her. 

“Do I look like I’m kidding?!” The air around Rangiku popped and crackled from the sheer might of her fury. “Either you run after her right now or I will.” The last part she said so low and dangerously that he felt like there was a dagger against his throat. 

“Fine.” He sighed and stood, brushing dirt from his clothes. If this conversation was going to happen, he needed to at least appear composed. He was going to need all the help he could get. 


End file.
